Vendramism is a religion founded in 1892 by His Holiness Sri Vendra Yallah (1874 - 1906). In short, Vendramists believe that the world as we know it is nothing more than a gathering of cosmic energies, good and evil, coming from a place called Barest ("where Gods sleep"). The human race is made up of disembodied spirits from all planes of existence, still resonating of the prime Omm, that in their need to evolve further and further have the need to escape Barest and its materialism and join the highly realized spirits in Awt-bar ("where Gods show"). You can easily achieve this goal and escape the law of Karma by practising His word everyday.

Sri Vendra Yallah was born in a village called Paes, near Madras, India, on December 25th, 1874. He came out of his mother's womb with His eyes wide awake, and the broken wheel of Karma on His left arm and leg. His father was a Muslim from Rawalpindi, Pakistan, and a rich merchant in textures; his mother was a nephew of Yogananda, the famous yogi and guru. In fact, when the child was born, a multitude gathered as the news of such birth omens spread, and even Yogananda said "This child is the Prophet who will break the Karma chains. Rejoyce, for the long awaited dawn has come.". Sri Vendra grew up in Paes until the age of 18 and had three children from His first wife Purusa. During these years, he learned to master Yoga and taught the people about Buddhism and Induism.
In 1892 He decided it was the right time to unveil His full message, but He knew that His mission was to bring the news to the West. He went to England with just a few selected disciples and founded His first Vendramitic asram near Regent's Park. He started teaching the English, but was not fully satisfied of their spiritual response. "They are still too deep into Barest", he said, and moved away for a better spiritual field. In a vision he had in 1895, he saw St. Francis calling Him to "complete his work." He then decided to move to Assisi, Italy, where St. Francis had lived. When he was in Milan, during his trip to Assisi, he saw a golden globe coming down from the sky and landing in front of Him; he thence understood he had found the right place. He then founded another asram in Milan in the place the golden globe taught Him; and though facing an unfair opposition from the Catholic Church, this asram is still active today.
In a few years, disciples coming from all over Europe were gathering in His Milan asram to meet Him, and then founded Vendra asrams when going back home. By 1902, Vendramism was present in Austria, France, Germany, Spain, Switzerland, Denmark, Norway and Russia.
On July 27th, 1905, He felt his earthly time was almost over, and that Awt-bar was calling Him again. So, He decided to visit South America, where He felt the karma had accumulated most. He learnt Spanish in a single week and moved to Bogotá with just his most beloved disciples Silvia and David and Jean-Luc; and there He passed away with full spiritual realization on July 27th, 1906. His last words, whispered to his mournful disciples, were "La vita xé un bidon".

Our blessed guru Sri Vendra is sometimes referred to as 'the spy of being'. In fact, His holy acts have been named 'existential intelligence', meaning that He is the Messiah sent from God (as the Being is seldom addressed) to get into His disciples' personality and know their most hidden secrets. The same goes for UFOs. In the universe of the Living Being, spirits have two diffent paths to follow to acquaint complete Vendrity: one goes from the Selfish Self to the Whole, the other from the Whole to the Self. Construction is earthly, and is the state of man; destruction is non-material, and such are the ways of UFOs. By going trough a cycle made of successive constructions and deconstructions, even a low level soul can obtain eventual freedom in the state of the Living Vendra Min ("he who knows how to get Vendra").
UFOs have intelligence activities around our planet because they're not completely material - matter is what they are hoping to understand and eventually find. That's why they are often seen, but never actually found: one could say their plane of reality is a little bit shifted from ours, and they are lacking with the concept of the Self. Men are login for deliverance from the prisons of materialism - and so are sending their love streams into the air trought the careful presence of the Vendra. This is known as "Alien Thanksgiving Ceremony".
The Vendra guarantees with the symbol of His bald head and Beard that this meeting is possible and useful for both parts.

Men are not able to look over their shoulder and see with their own eyes what is going on. You can see traces of this phenomenon in all aspects of our reality: pollution, wars, drug abuse, kids violence, gummy pop corn and so on. But the evil forces behind this Selfish Self are not just parts of the man himself, neither reside in Barest, that is not completely good or evil in itself: the cause of all this is known as Zdra ("foolish ignorance") that catalyzes negative energies coming from Barest and puts them in the middle of a man's heart. Zdra is what makes a man never express his full self in conjunction and harmony with the Living Being, but sticks mankind to a part in a play it doesn't really need. So mankind cannot deconstruct his Selfish Self and therefore he cannot access the pearl gates of Awt-bar.

But there is a way for the wise and the pure to put Awt-bar as their goal, as the end of a life-long path: this is practising Vendrism. With simple but subtle changes in your heart and in your everyday's life, you too can be Vendra!!! In his last famous Bogotà speech, Mahatma Vendra showed two different ways to full enlightment:

• The Fast Way, being a Vecchiuz (a Vendrist monk) in one of our communes;
• The Ordinary Way, the one for everyday people who don't want to abandon everyday's life.
  

• Whenever possible, behave in a fragmentary, incoherent and contradictory way, for that is the way of the Prophet.
• Smoke ritual tobacco not less than ten times a day, while meditating on the deconstruction of the mind and repeating the holy mantra Bidon;
• Wear in white and gold (white and red on holidays);
• Never continue a single activity for more than an hour, because this lets the Zdra forces come into your soul and divert you from youur goals;
• Never be sad, but never let more than a quiet smile curl your lips. Have no fear of the world and its ways if you put your trust in Sri Vendra Yallah, but remember that your final goal is your spirits, not your goods.
• Do not eat or wash your body with your right hand (Sri Vendra had the broken wheels of Karma on His left arm);
• Avoid whenever possible any form of manual or phisical activity, or at least reduce it to the absolute least;
• Do not take part or get involved in politics;
• Do not represent human bodies in paintings or statues but the image of the Prophet.

Vendramism, as every other religion, is deeply concerned about its adepts sexual life. His Holiness himself thought that a quite moderate but correct sexual activity could be a key to the pearly doors of Awt-bar. As westeners today seem to have forgotten what a truly human sexual intercourse is, here comes the Prophet to be our reminder.
All male Vendra believers should be strictly monogamous. This is to achieve balance and quietness in both body, mind and soul. Also, men should devote themselves to a single woman because their energy shoul depolarize itself and rest. This is not true for women, who can have as many partners as they wish, of course strictly respecting Vendramitic customs and laws: their bodies filter energies coming from Awt-bar in a different manner, and Sri Vendra in His lore taught us to do so.
Sex should not be, anyway, every day's hobbyhorse! Sex is a sacred thing when two Selfs meet and join, and so should be practised only on Hollowed Days: December 25th, when His Holiness was born, January 11th, when He reached enlightment, and March 21st, the first day in spring. No contraceptive should be used, because any being concieved on one of those days will easily become a Vendra, and so it should be given the opportunity to enlight this world of darkness on the footprints of the Prophet. While having sexual intercourse, both partners should repeat the mantra Bidon and should stop at least once to smoke ritual tobacco.
Any sexual intecourse possible on any of the Hollowed Days is absolutely mandatory for all true Vendramists.

PRAYER FOR FOOD AND TOBACCO

"Holy Holy Sri Vendra Yallah, real be your name! We thank you for realizing this blessed present, that once was just an uncertain future. We thank you for this food and tobacco that you sacrificed yourself for to realize. We hope and know you will defeat Barest, and will drive us into a new light in Awt-bar. Make our world solid and real until tonight, and float in time to save but the least creature. Bidon."

And now a short exerceipt from "Sri Vendra Yallah - Life of a modern saint":

69. While Sri Vendra Yallah was taking a nap, a group of young women went closer to ask His advice. The foregoing night they returned home long after the cedar's shadows had dissolved in darkness. So, their fathers beat them hardly. As they were angry with their fathers, the morning after they refused to prepare brekfast and retired on the mountain.
His Holiness listened carefully, smoked two cigarettes and said: "Hate and love your father, for he sacrifices himself to mediocrity in the name of the mass. Despise your father: this is the unborn principle in a wise man's pedagogy. Only in the scorn of the father liberty can exist, for he is a symbol of individualization, urging you to be better than others and to study more and more." These were the words of the wise beyond all wise men.

All around the net, there is a considerable amount of Vendramist resources that can be accessed for the inquisitive:

• alt.religion.vendra and alt.support.vendra newsgroups;
• vendra-l@vendra.org, the official Vendramitic mailing list;
• #vendram channel on IRC

• Zen
• Tobacco
• Baldness
• CH.I.P.S. (the TV series was created by a Vendrist, John Hancock)

• Sri Vendra Yallah, "Thoughts and Poems", ed. Asram Vidya, 1902 (reprint 1987)
• Sri Vendra Yallah, "A Guide to Happines", ed. Asram Vidya, 1898 (reprint 1987)
• Sri Vendra Yallah, "The Ash Books", ed. Asram Vidya, 1903 (reprint 1987)
• David Winners, "Sri Vendra Yallah - Life of a modern saint", ed. Asram Vidya, 1922
• Stefy Schepise, "Scippo alle poste", ed. Schizzo, 1984
• Luca Disaronno, "Il Vendra e l'arte della manutenzione della motocicletta", Classici Humour, 1991
• Jean-Luc Condor, "Myths and the Being: economical analysis in Vendramitic theology", Harper&Row, 1988
• Airoldi, Brunetti, Coda, "Economia Aziendale", ed. Il Mulino, 1990
• Gino Zaccaria, "L'Etica Originaria", ed. EGEA, 1994